Ok, so finally got to watch Black Swan (its OnDemand). And I intentionally avoided talking to anyone about this movie before seeing it, specifically because I didn’t want to go into it jaded. The only thing I really knew was that there was this super-hot lesbian scene with Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis. Ok so what. And really it wasn’t THAT lesbian, they were just sorta makin out and eluded to acts of a sexual nature. Sure it was a little more graphic than most movies will get into, but putting that in a neat little box and setting it aside for the time being, I really have to admit this movie blew me away. There’s not the typical “oh she’s a ballerina, so she’s suffering bulimia” or anything like that. There’s a heavy emphasis on the drive and determination it takes to commit to a profession like ballet. Nina (Natalie Portman) is clearly the physical representation of her mother’s hopes and dreams to live vicariously through her daughter, being well into her adult life and still living at home. Her mother is seriously overbearing, interfering, controlling even. Amidst all of the strain of dancing the role of the Swan Queen, Nina begins to rebel…to “live a little” as she’s told more than once throughout the course of the film. We’re carried through a very cerebral plotline, with little twists and hallucinations… things that don’t quite make sense immediately. But, by the time of the performance, everything becomes abundantly clear, and Nina quite literally FEELS her performance, makes it a part of her.. and as every great artist knows, with the completion of a masterpiece, a little piece of you dies with it. The final act, Nina performs with what we can only assume to be a fatal wound. For a short time, I even became convinced that the person on the screen was no longer Natalie Portman, but an alter ego within the actress, who truly felt the horror and desperation of the character.. who became the Black Swan.
And so this leads me into today’s little life lesson.. I don’t want to stab myself or harm myself in order to achieve any goal I might set for myself, but if we were to take anything from the “moral” of the story as it were, I would say that the lesson to be learned is to let yourself go. Be fearless in the face of the inevitable. Accept what is, what was and what cannot be, embrace what will be, and then, maybe just maybe, we too can be free to enjoy what life has to offer. If what you are is not who or what you wish to be, make the metamorphosis happen. Take whatever steps are necessary to bring about the changes. Throw yourself into the arms of the crazy French crossdressing guy from “Elizabeth”.
Or don’t. He’s just creepy.
